Frozen

Left alone
gasping for air
on the cold damp pavement
wishing for the impossible.

Submissive to fear
of the unknown
lingering in the dark corners
of my mind.

Forgetting the light
of the once true happiness
shattered into crystallized
tears that wont stop falling.

A heart that forgot how to beat
a life forgetting to live
lifeless eyes that have seen
the end of everything.

Living Blind

I've lost everything
all that's left is my eyes
but I don't like what I see
so please let me die.

a zombie with flesh is what I've become
a prison for my youth and the young

a dreamless life
lost in misdirection
taken everything from me
except my own afflictions.

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All my memories,
secrets pinpointed
inside gas station intervals
and crowded shopping malls
we hide ourselves in dusk
never wanting to reveal the day.
Everything Proclaims a Beginning.

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Light in the air
and stars in the sky
her breath is still
as I silently hold her.

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Rant:
No matter how much a person says they care about you or if you care about them, they always seem to leave in the end. ALWAYS. I've lost so many good things this year. my family for my moms selfish reason of whatever it was this time. it all just seems childish. I mean, we all have so many other IMPORTANT life changing, or threatening (depends on how you view it) things we need to focus on. Not petty things like religion, or the status of being gay or bi, or fucking straight. Why in the fuck do we care about that shit???!! It's love for God sakes.. Just let people love each other! Is that too fucking hard for the mindset of America today? We elected the worst president ever. Of course it would be...

Life, Love and Changes

The enormity of everything happening now, I think is a blessing. I have found my way in life, who I am supposed to be. I have learned and loved and laughed and cried. I am not finished with my life, but I am on  a journey to become who I need to be. Many friends and family will be missed and lost along the way, but It will be worth it.

Love is a hard fact to face in life. You'll gain it, lose it, cry over it, and heal from it. There have been times in my life I have thought I had found it, but, in most cases, my heart gets broken instead. I have learned to have faith in the impossibility of somethings, but love is the closest thing we have to magic. We are afraid to fall, but  once we do, we are in a dream. On a high. Then, if you lose it, we crash. But we get back up and try again, never losing faith in something that will always be within our reach. Always and Forever.

Mistakes have to be made in order to grow. Love has to be experienced in order for you to know what you want. Fights have to be lost in order to win.

The greatest thing you can ever experience in life, is the moment of clarity in you life. The moment you know who you are, who you love, and what you can do. Life is limitless. Love is incandescent.

I have learned to NEVER GIVE UP. Ever. Even if the fight makes you weak, and your heartache is too much to bear. Never. Give. Up. If you keep on, you will accomplish so much.

I am done ranting. I just really needed to get this off my chest. Thanks for understanding. I love you.

                                                                                    -Kat/Kelly

Black Bird

Trapped. Broken. Fallen. 
 The smothering cloud of amphetamines suffocates my judgement of a wasted dream. Everything I've ever known is crumbling and crashing and burning out in my hallowed mind. I'm screaming and crying out for all those whose innocence is lost in the catching fire of our "perfect" government. Faded and shattered in shame showered in sins. I have fought to keep the flesh and blood of everything i love. I will die to keep this country around as the perfect American dream it was meant to be, instead of ashes and bones and bodies littered in the blood stained streets. 

Music

Music is a great source of stress relief. I enjoy relaxing to Coldplay and Blue October but there's so many genres out there. It's amazing! Music is a great influence in this generation. It makes us happy, or sad, or filled with hate or the most wonderful joy we've ever felt. I love that feeling of being free. Our life, I found is like one big soundtrack with a periphal truth underneath. A sound waiting to be a word.

Beauty on the Inside

Have you guys seen the new cover of "Sports Illustrated"? It's sick and offending. I'm sorry, but I cannot stand by with this one. Teenage Girls have enough on the plates without the added pressure of trying to become something impossible. The media has got to STOP! NOW! Girls are beautiful on the inside and out and they don't need to strive to become something their not. Just be yourself. The cover is of Kate Upton, without a bra. Granted she's still slightly covered with a jacket, but that doesnt stop some cleavge from showing through. Has she no respect for herself at all?! There is another "porn" thing too. An Italian calander of girls in the nude. It's grotesque and it needs to end. Women have to stop protraying themselves as just eye candy. Because they are so much more. You are so much more capable of something other than being hot. Beauty Redefined is an amazing website I think every girl should look at. I will attach the link here.

http://www.beautyredefined.net/

It is an amazing website.

"If beauty hurts, we're doing it wrong."

Thanks!

Hello Fellow Bloggers! Hope you are wonderful, as am I. I am working hard on my writing, but go figure not much to write about here. lolz. I am looking at schools right now and leaning towards the Art Institue of Salt Lake. :) Pretty excited. Plus, am hoping to watch "The Perks of being a Wallflower" soon. I've heard it's really amazing and down to earth. I love those kinds of films. So, I will post more on that later. Hope you had an amazing V Day! Peace out! Boop!